Saturday, July 05, 2008


My life changed forever. and so did another woman's. She was just a girl really, but I bet she has seen far more than most would ever want to see. Which probably makes her a woman in her eyes.
I was sitting at home minding my own business. The phone rang and I saw it was *dfacs, but I had a 9 month old little girl, so I thought it may have something to do with her. (They know I never take more than one baby,hahahhahha)
They said it was an emergency. Like they don't always say that. BUT, this was the first time, they had told me that.
The story, it was sad. A baby boy, 7 months old. Mom was homeless, living hotel to hotel. Refusing transport to Dr. appts, WIC & welfare for the baby. Tested + for drugs. I'm sure you know the story, most of you have heard it a hundred times or more.
I said, I don't know. You know I already have a 9 month old. And we really don't take more than one at a time. More fair to the baby, you know. No, I say, I don't think so. *Long silence. *D, she says, We don't have anywhere to put him. It's after office hours (it was about 6:00pm)
I thought about what my husband would say, where I would put him. We only had a car at the time, that already had a car seat & a place for the 16 yr old. We would be wall to wall babies.
And for some reason, known only to God to this day. I said OK. I'll be right there.
I went in & picked up a chubby, ugly, brown haired, brown eyed, crying baby. I sat up most of the night rocking him. He was scared. And, well, I wasn't very happy either. I had no idea what had got into me. Why, in God's name, did I do this? What made me think I could do 2 babies pretty much the same age? And look at him! With his too big, chubby cheeks, you couldn't even see his chin for those cheeks! Ugly little thing I told myself. (first brick to go up in "the wall" of not bonding. (for me)
I just bet God was laughing so hard. He was saying, just wait girl, you'll think that boy hung the moon and stars! And you'll think he's the handsomest boy to walk the earth. AND your husband! Oh, you just wait. That man will love this boy, and bring him so much joy.
My God, He is a Great God.
Was it really just 2 years ago? Why does it seems I have always been the mother of this beautiful, intelligent miracle?
Did I really come that close to missing one of God's greatest blessings in our lives?
OH, and what did my husband say when I called to tell him I was on my way to pick a 7 month old baby boy? "I can't wait to see him." What did he say when he saw him? "Would you look how cute that boy is" and "Look at all that hair, I think he's the cutest baby boy I've ever seen".
And what did he say 2 months ago, after the adoption was final? "You are my son, my pride and joy. You will be a man after God's own heart."
I wonder if there is another woman who remembers that day as well as I do?


Lovingmyamazinglife said...

What a beautiful story.

Anita said...

That makes me feel all warm and fuzzy, D. Yep, God knew! It's so cool! You are blessed, friend!

Liz said...

aww.gave me a tear. very sweet

Diane said...

I loved reading your post about your "ugly" little baby boy. It was a beautiful post. And I'm glad he turned out beautiful, as if there were ever any doubt in God's eyes! I need to try to remember to see my foster daughter A. through God's eyes. She is also beautiful.


Perri said...

I don't usally cry reading blog posts, but this one got me.

Momto5 RachelJoy Photography said...

hey that's real sweet. i got the shiver.

happy day to you!

dot said...

Made me cry! Beautiful writing. Beautiful story. He's a cute one!