It just doesn't do THIS around here

That is snow, people. On Christmas day. The word around here is that hasn't happened since 1892! IF we get snow it's usually in late Jan. or Feb. and then it gently floats down and promptly melts. Just the way we like it.
With a sick Boy here, this snow did us no snowman making good. Hopefully it will all be gone in a few hours/days.

A Serious Public Service Announcement

How can "they", who ever they may be, do this........

There's a site called Spokeo.com that's a new online, USA phone book w/personalinformation: everything from pics you've posted on FB or web, your approx credit score, home value, income, age, etc. You can remove yourself by first searching for yourself on their site to find the URL of your page, Copy that the URL ,then going back to their home page, Go to the Privacy button on the bottom of their page to remove yourself.

Just what I need, one more way for Bp or crazy people to find me or know my personal stuff.

A New Man in my life

I've waited a few years for this man.
I know this is a bit late for Christmas, but I wanted to show him to you.
I can't bring myself to pack him away with the rest of Christmas. So he will just have to sit out all year long.
The Boy is enamored of him too. He loves to pick him up and just look at him. I do too, truth be told.
I've read Mari's blog for YEARS, OK, 2 or 3 years. She always shows her Husband's beautiful wood carvings and every year I fall in love with one of the Santas.
This year I finally got one. He's a beauty too.
My horrid picture taking pales compared to Mari's beautiful ones. You can click on the heading "A New Man" to see what gorgeous things her husband carves. And you'll find a wonderful blogger too.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

This CHILD !

Comes up with some of the craziest things he wants to BE. Not pretend to be. But insists he has to BE whatever it is that comes to his mind.
This week, he had to BE a robot. He even sat down at the table and drew all the "things" he would need to become a robot. Unfortunately for Daddy, he's the one that has to implement these ideas the boy comes up with.
At this VERY moment, he is insisting he NEEDS to be a Tank. A real TANK. I'll post more of these ideas the Boy comes up with as soon as I can find all the pictures of
things that ping around in his brain.

What good does it do?

If you make the kids go to therapy (at tax payers expense)and FP* time/expense, because we are not compensated in anyway for therapy trips.
And only use their recommendations when it suits you?
That's exactly what happened in baby #1 case today.
I'm not even going to go into the hell that happened here on Friday. We'll call
it a total disrespectful breakdown of communications and leave it at that.
But today was a FTM^ where (in theory) they heard the therapist* recommendation on
transition*, then after she hung up from the conference call,told all parties that it was a load of BS, and they would proceed with what they intended to do. REALLY, THEY DID.
IF, big IF, we keep doing this, it will have to be with no emotion as to when, how or if it's in their best interest to be *transitioned. If they will not listen to the therapist's recommendations on *transition. My opinion has got less than a snowball's chance.
I keep asking myself how much worse can it get? Bad question...it always gets worse.

Too Much Thinking can drive you nuts

Cindy's last half of a sentence on her blog here made me stop for 30 minutes contemplating more things than I care to think about.
"What made me think I could make a difference?"
Boy #1 will be leaving tomorrow at 6:00pm. 48 Hours notice after 19 months of a long, hard road, just isn't enough time to process anything. We told him he would be leaving to live with so & so. He looked at me for a minute and said "OK" It's a bad time to be moving a *RAD child. First you'll have the all too wonderful honeymoon & then the all consuming idyllic Christmas. I can see a huge crash coming, ohhhhh mid January? When real life kinda kicks in. For both child & adoptive parent.
I have sat here and thought of Cindy's words for some time. Realistically, what difference have I made in his life or any of the lives of the children I take in and care for? This is not a oh poor me, nobody appreciates what I do moment. The question is real, to the gut, real. I offer a roof,bed, food & a hug and things to play with. Period.
To answer Cindy's question. I honest to God can not think of any difference I have made in their lives. Why do I advocate for these children & not even the policy makers follow their own rules. That my friends is the definition of beating your head against a wall.
So, do I settle for not making a difference in their lives. Parking a kid in my house, no emotions shown (because that is what they want) Or do I continue to beat myself up because I feel I have failed yet another child. I don't know if I can do either. But I also don't know if I can NOT open my house up to a child who needs a roof.
Too many things going through my head tonight. And I still have another one of these transitions to make soon enough...

Why am I surprised?

I was given 48 hours notice that baby #1 would be moved permanently to his new home.
With no regard to what the therapist says, or anything else.
Why this continues to surprise me, baffles me. I guess I always think, this time they'll do it right. And every single time they prove me wrong.
I have yelled the wrong doing from the roof top, so to speak, to no avail. I am now hoarse, no voice left with which to yell. If the ones making the rules, will not follow them...my hands are literally tied.
At the very least I know he's going to a good home.

How do you know...

That you go to McDonalds* too much?
When you pull up to Wal*greens prescription window and the 2 yr old yells, " Wanna Chee-burger!"
I have no idea where these kids get this stuff.

Answers, kinda (Updated)

JWG had some good questions, I thought I'd answer. Since frankly, around here, these things could go a million different ways.
The asked:
How long do you think they will be with you? Are they likely to find adoptive homes soon? How good is the agency involved at the transition process? Are they old enough to understand what is happening? So many questions.

Because the kids have been with me anywhere from their entire lives (25 months) to 18 months and their ages will be taken into consideration. I will make sure that the transition is slow with the one that has been with us his whole life. He will have a very a hard time with all this. We are all he has ever known and will not understand.They will start looking for a placement for this child within our county in the next few days is my guess.
The second child already has a placement in place and has been visiting them on a limited based for a couple months. That will be stepped up in the weeks to come. He will be with his new family in 3-6 six weeks is my guess.
The almost 3 year old "kinda" knows he will be going to live with the people he is visiting with. And it is not a problem for him. He loves them to death. They are wonderful people who love him alot. And it will help that we will still be apart of his life.
The child we've had all his life, well that's another story. He does not nor will not understand what will be happening to him. That is why I will fight for an extended transition for him. He is very attached and will not understand why he is leaving mommy & daddy. And because a family has not been identified as a placement, I can't say if we will be able to continue to be apart of his life.
All complicated & a delicate dance of who's the mommy now, where authority lies.
But I will make sure it works out well in the end. A smooth transition is 80% of my job.

Susan asked: Just wondering why you are not going to adopt the little guy you've had since birth?
Well, the simple answer is "I'm done". As far as we are concerned our family is finished. I don't feel either of these kids were meant to be ours. More practically, we can't afford any more children. My husband is nearing retirement we look foreward to some time when it is just us.(not gonna happen anytime soon since the Boy is only 5) I have been a mama since I was 17. I need a rest. sometimes I must admit I grow weary from all the demands put on me as a mother, a MeMe, wife, employee & foster mother. But God has been known to have a sense of humor. I never thought God would give me a son at age 40. So who knows what He has up his sleeve.

Wow

Mama #2 will voluntarily sign her rights over.
Nothing in this crazy world ever makes sence.
But now I know my boys will have good homes.

one down

One *TPR down...one more to go. Hopefully the judge will be in the same mood on friday.
These babies deserve the very best homes. Mom #1 just walked away, didn't show for court. Friday will be interesting.

Go Figure

Both of the Bmothers for my 2 little ones have dropped off the face of the earth.
One has been "working" her case*plan for 2 yrs and the other 20 months.
*poof* Gone. They could have saved us all alot of grief and done it along time ago. Not to mention they could have been in great adopt!ve homes long ago.
I'll never understand.

Too Cute

http://www.portablenorthpole.tv/home

I used this site last year too.
The Boy loved it! It's free or you can buy a permanent link to it.
They will send you an email with the video link.