I don't know how you do it

Well, most times neither do I. Or more importantly (most times) I don't know WHY I do it.
This came from their *therapist! At our last appointment the *therapist said,"I don't know how you do this time after time, kid after kid." Well, none of the kids I've had in these past 7 or 8 years have been as difficult as these 2. These 2 have been through/seen/done/endured more than the babies I usually take. I try to keep this in mind as one throws the 17th hissy fit/melt down/murderous rage in 24 hours or the other pees her pants for 3rd time while playing 5 steps from the bathroom, making up random lies & accidentally kicking her sibling in the stomach for 14th time. So sometimes I feel a little frustrated. Because there is no discipline I can gently toss their way that can come close to what they've endured their whole lives. (I WILL kick anybody in the head who suggests a sticker chart) The SW asked if their behavior overwhelmed me. I asked her if there were any other *foster*families* out there that could manage their behaviors & deal with one of them having active*herpes*outbreaks* every 3 weeks (which means protecting their families, other sibling & keeping him from any other kids/people (no daycare or school) for 7-10 days with every outbreak*??? She said, "Oh sure, there's lots of families who could/would do it." First BLESS THEIR HEARTS. Then I told her she would be the first one I called if I felt I could no longer deal with them.
You might be asking yourself WHY did this conversation come to take place?
I asked for respite* care so the Boy and I could go visit the absent husband for spring*break.
They told me I had used my 5 days of *respite we get per year, when I went to see my dad in ICU* and then the 4 days I was gone for his funeral.
YES, our county loves and respects their foster*parents.
Be a Foster*parent today. We need you.
I'm only slightly bitter and a lot burned out.

P.S -- I sincerely hope not all counties in America treat FP like ours do.
I'm sure there are good *agencies out there. I just don't happen to live where there is one.