I want even go into how it came to be that I ask you this question. I'll let you use your imagination.
How can you have a 5 month old baby and be 5 months pregnant?
I've been a mama...a nurse... & somebody with a little common sense for a long time and for the life of me I can't figure this one out. Or maybe I just don't want to think about it.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
I want even go into how it came to be that I ask you this question. I'll let you use your imagination.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Dfacs* made a mistake! Can you believe it?
Actually (they tell me) CPS* made the mistake.
What mistake? Calling Gma and telling her to come pick up Baby Weepy's sister from the hospital. It seems the CPS dept. didn't know there was another child in care & that ICPC* was being done on Gma. Which disqualified her as a placement for new baby.
Gma came all the way from another state, to be told,"oh sorry, our mistake".
I understand her irritation at the system... I deal with it everyday in alot of different ways.
I got a call yesterday asking if I could come to the hospital to pick the baby up.
Picking a newborn baby up from the hospital is never "pretty", for some reason I'm always the bad guy??? I didn't pop + for drugs. I'm not taking your kid away.
I didn't have anything "nice" to say to mom who was still high on crack. So I chose not to say anything to her. Her mother knew all the updates on Baby Weepy, who she all the sudden was worried about after 5 months. I have no pity or politeness for women who choose to do that to innocent babies. You may feel differently, and that's fine. I have a hard time holding my tongue when asked questions, I tend to give truthful answers. So it really was best not to say anything to her at this particular time. We'll see if she really wants her children back or drops off the face of the earth like she did 5 months ago.
If this seems all over the place, it's because I'm running on 3 hours sleep and a dim memory of what it's like to take care of a newborn and get "stuff" done.
If your keeping score, I now have a 3yr old, 2 yr old, 5 month old and a 3 day old.
After this, I'm taking loooong break. I promise.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Raise your hand if you know the answer.
I got a phone call informing me baby weepy has a sibling. (I had been hoping she was lieing about being pregnant, but I guess not) and would I be able to take the baby if they could not find a suitable relative? (Hello, that's why I have baby weepy) I told them yes, I would. The only relative was gma in another state who was trying to get baby weepy through ISPC* but she had been working on it for 5 months and had gotten no where yet. Had only visited one time. They said, "OK, you'll be hearing from us."
Then I get a call from Gma saying a SW had called her and asked if she could come take this new baby from the hospital, because she tested + for drugs. The SW said come tomorrow, sign papers and take the baby back to the other state.
NOW, I ask YOU. Am I Crazy to think, WHAT is going on? If she is good enough to take this newborn (which she said she'd never do because of her age) right from the hospital in this state & same county & take back to another state, WHY? has baby weepy been in care for 5 months? Why are things not good enough for her to take Baby Weepy? I think it's whatever is convenient for them at the time. This has my brain (or what's left of it) reeling.
I don't get it. Am I missing something. It's not even that CPS* wasn't involved with the new one, because they are. As soon as she tested pos. a SW was called and a case opened.
Just when you think you've seen it all.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
The first one is last year. The last one this year. Can you tell the difference? A little less baby face maybe?
(he would like you to click on the last picture, so you can see his turtle pants...he's very proud of them)
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Monday, April 13, 2009
Do you have "team meetings" for your foster children?
It's where everyone involved with the case meet and in theory talk about where the case is going and what the bfamily needs to do to get their children back, ie-- stop doing drugs.
Usually in attendance is: the case worker, the casa, the foster parent, the bparent/family and a "family advocate" (still not real sure where they fit in). I've worked with this family advocate before and she is all about reunification and she's great with the families.
I usually just sit there and let the others do their thing. They tell the bparent what needs to be done, what they've done so far and based on their history with dfacs* if it will be a concurrent or reunification case.
This is where it gets interesting...I always try to go to these meetings because this is where you learn what is REALLY going on.
When it's my turn to talk, I tell them I had her first child in care 4 yrs ago. At which point she interjects "yea, I know I was in prison then, but I didn't know your name. You gots my boy now?" I say "ummmm, NO. We were not the couple IN THE COURT ROOM WITH YOU when he was adopted 3 years ago." I go on to tell them how well Baby K is doing and what a good baby he is. AT this point she feels free to tell us how hard she tried with Baby K...only doing drugs occasionally, and only one time did she forget where she left him. She tried really hard...in the 3 months she had him. (He's 4 months old now)
I tell her to just work her case plan and I was sure she would be taking her baby home soon. blah, blah, blah, I'm sure is what she heard.
BECAUSE here is where she lets the room know, if all she has is 6 months to work a case plan (because of her history with & loss of a child for the same reasons 4 yrs ago) she didn't know how she could do it all ---ALL being get a job, keep it, find a decent place to live and a car--
BECAUSE she's 3 months pregnant. She goes on to say she doesn't know why or how this always happens to her. She just picks the worst guys. ( I guess she's never heard of birth control, in whatever form) or heck stay away from guys for more than 3 weeks after giving birth.
I'm just a prude like that, I guess.
Unfortunately,all these meetings go about the same. Same story, same outcome. I know this story plays out all over the United States every day. What's going on? Why are these women making a choice to not parent their children? and yes, I believe it is a choice. When you do something 2,3,4 or more times, it's a choice.
I swear I'll never understand the way they think.
Am I being too critical? No, really you can be honest.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
What a long day!
Baby Weepy's surgery went perfectly. They drained off alot of fluid & infection. Literally 3 hours after the surgery,he was a different child. He was happy, smiling, babbling up a storm. Playing like he has never played. He was trying to do flips in the floor! He said at least 4 new words he'd never said before. I expected changes, but not so quick! The Dr said it relieved so much pressure off his little head he had to feel better. He said it would be hard for him to feel any worse.
It's amazing to think a 15 minute surgery could make such a HUGE difference in a little life.
He said it was so bad there was no telling how long it had been in there.
I'm so happy this is over...now to work on those teeth!
Monday, April 06, 2009
Baby Weepy became sicker over the weekend. His ear pointed straight foreward from all the fluid buildup and continued to have high fevers. Lucky me, I knew this was a little something called mastoiditis. I wont bore you with the details. Let's just say he's a sick boy. I had been told last Thursday the Dr's surgery schedule was booked almost to the end of the month.
I took him in this morning to let the dr tell me what I already knew, but he needed to be aware the kid was going down hill fast. Before I even seen the Dr, the tech came and said, "oh, I had a note to call you today and tell you his surgery has been scheduled for this Wed.!!" That's right, day after tomorrow!
I hate getting up at the crack of dawn for a surgery I know will not happen for 2 or 3 more hours, but I'll have to grin and bear it. Because that's pretty great news! He really couldn't have lasted very much longer. His ears are FULL of infection.
Thank God it happened so fast and without me having to beg & plead.
Two things going perfectly...I don't know if I can handle it.
Friday, April 03, 2009
They did something right!
I guess it was bound to happen sooner or later.
My fear was that they would take their sweet time getting the surgery paperwork signed, since it has to be signed by the director. ( It's taken weeks before with other kids and The Boys never happened, we paid for it after the adoption)
This is the email I got a mere one day after the consult:
Hi, Ms. D
Ms SW wasn't here this afternoon when the doctor's office fax arrived. Ms. Director signed the consent for surgery, and I returned the consents via fax to Dr. A's office at 3:20 pm today. Please let me know if there are any problems with this and I can resend it. Also please let us know when little BabY Weepy's procedure is scheduled.
Thanks!! Ms supervisor
Is it too late for an April fools joke? Can this be real? My fear is that someone will jump out at the surgery and yell, " You didn't really think we were going to make this EASY, did you?"
How sad when you expect it to be messed up and complicated, but are scared when things go too easy.
Thank God they did what they were supposed to...for his sake.
Thursday, April 02, 2009
Baby weepy is sick, sick ,sick. He has massive ear infections that will not go away. He flat lined on his hearing test today. (no sound getting thru to the ear drum) I've been up 2 nights in a row from midnight til 7am cleaning up body fluids best left un-de-scribed and washing bedding & clothes.
High fevers, the whole thing. He had a fever of 102.5 AFTER a Rocephin shot today. and I have to take him back for another tomorrow. He'll get tubes in his ears ASAP or when the county decides to sign off on it.
Baby K continues to be a great baby. Which means I'm sure he'll be leaving soon. I only get to keep the very sick ones it seems. I kid. But he is a doll.
Poor baby weepy has had a hard road, after these 2 surgeries maybe he'll be where is should be physically.