Doing the same things over & over the very exact same WAY,with the exact same People and expecting Different Results. Now who is stupid? Me or Them? Me, that's who.
Because, each and every time I expect they will do things differently THIS TIME. This time they will do it right. This time they'll do what's best for the child. This time they'll do it like the "book" says it should be done. THIS TIME. In five years This Time has not come. Nor does it look like it will happen This Time.
Remember I told you about the Boy's "Siser"? We knew the time would be soon that she would be transitioning to her new permanent placement with relatives. WE knew this was coming. But common sense & the state says there should be a transition time for the child, into the new home. Granted she has visited once a week for 1 1/2 hours for 3 months. But she does not know them. It's like we leave her once a week for an hour to run to the store or something. No overnights or weekends. We know this is the best placement for her, we don't argue that point. We WANT her to go to this relative. We think they are wonderful. But give a kid a break. We've had her since since she was 6 months old & she is now 21 months old. To her, we are her parents.
Soooooooo, I get a call from the sw saying no visit would be needed this month, because they were just going to go ahead and move her to this placement on Friday! Yes, this Friday. 2 days notice. She called at 6:00 last night.
I just told her I thought that was pretty crappy. The poor kid wouldn't know what hit her.
I asked why no transition time and she actually said,"oh, well, I just don't see kids doing transitions anymore, it's just boom, there you are." YOU have got to be kidding me. I told her of the 6 yr old we had & the transition time he was allowed. and reinerated the fact that I thought the Girl would get the short end of the stick if they did it this way & in general told her of my concerns about attachments later on, if this placement did not work, because she is still a legal risk.(since dad has decided to work a case plan after 2 yrs) Finally she said,"you may be right, I'll have to ask my supervisor tomorrow though".
All that we do to keep these kids safe, protected & loved. ALL OF IT! The appointments, the people in and out of your house all the time. Ask permission to do this, go there. And for What?
So they can yank them up at moments notice to do what ever THEY feel is right and good. Don't bother asking or informing the person who cares for them 24/7 their opinion.
I don't want a medal or praise, not even a thank you is needed. Reimburse me for diapers and let me know what is going on in the CASE and treat the kids like they have some kind of rights.
Why do I get so upset every time they do this? It's not like they don't always do it this way. They are pretty consistent in screwing things up.
I honestly wonder if they ever think of the child as being an actual child with feelings and emotions. Or if they just think of them as a case load to be presented before a judge to see if all their paper work was done correctly.
I really am the stupid one.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Does anyone know why an 8 oz sippy cup full of milk looks to be a relatively small amount. Until you spill it all over the counter.? Why, when the milk hits the counter it turns into a gallon of milk that flows like the sea? I am such a klutz. They Boy was standing right at my heels (as always) and says,"oops, mama make a mess". Gee, thanks Boy, I hadn't noticed. Then he patted my leg and said, "it's OK, it's OK". Wow, when I spill Dove chocolate squares it never turns into more. Why is that?
Sunday, August 17, 2008
I see the Olympic Rings on TV, and automatically think,"Hey, that looks like a double Mickey Head!"
If you've seen my kinda new ticker. It is 14 months & 4 weeks (not 15 months) til our 7 day Disney Magic cruise to celebrate our 20th anniversary.
I am a planner. Our first trip to Disney World a few years back was planned down to the minute almost. Dinner reservations made, parks mapped out.
This cruise will be no different. Having never been on one, I must find out everything about them, especially a Disney Cruise. I must know all about the restaurants, what is on the menu's. What the itinerary will be for the kid's clubs for The Boy. How the room is laid out, what the entertainment is. How my bags will make it on the ship. How long will it take for our passports to come. I need an extra birth certificate for The Boy, in case they loose it at the passport office. ( for some reason I don't trust government agencies. I wonder why?) And good grief, WHAT kind of clothes do you wear on a cruise and good grief I need to loose 20 pounds.
So it's no wonder I see Mickey's head in the Olympic Rings! RIGHT?
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Is driving me crazy!
I could swear he's turning 2 instead of 3! All he has done for the past 3 days is whine and cry. I can't even walk out of the room without him having a fit. He wants me to be right with him all the time. He was just at the doctor's 2 weeks ago, so I don't think he's got an ear infection.
He has started to cry to go home if we go somewhere, like the grocery store. Makes eating hard, with no food. But of course he doesn't eat anyway, so that doesn't bother him. He's a little young to be a recluse.
How can anything this cute, drive me so crazy?
Monday, August 11, 2008
Have you seen or heard about this:
Go-- take a look & come back and tell me what you think. Good Idea? WHY? Bad Idea? WHY?
Don't be afraid to say what you really think. Keep it on anonymous if you want to.
I just want some honest feedback.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Thursday, August 07, 2008
By the way this thing can be flipped up side down later on, to make a loft bed. Rungs can be added to the 2 side by side bars you see. and the mattress will fit inside the blue "box" that is now the bottom of the bed & the canopy put back on. Pretty cool, huh?
Tuesday, August 05, 2008
We are coming up on a difficult explanation or time, I'm not sure what to call it.
The Boy thinks of TheBabyGirl as his sister. When he was in daycare, they called her, his sister, when talking to him. So he will sometimes refer to her as his "sister". This weekend he come to tell me, his sister was awake and wanted out of the crib.(just not in that many words) more like,"siser, out crib". I know he doesn't understand "relationship" at his age. But what he does know is she has been living in the same house as long as he can remember. She has been with us over a year. So that would have made him 18 months old when she came to live with us. She was 6 months old. She has been visiting with relatives who are interested in adopting her for a few months. The have all their relative foster care "stuff" out of the way, home study, back ground check, ect. So the time is coming in the near future that his "sister" will be leaving us. I am not sad because these people will be a great family for her and they love her. But how am I going to explain that to a nearly 3 yr old? One day she just isn't going to come home from one of her 3 hour visits. How is it going to effect him? Will he miss her? Will he think one day he will go somewhere, not to come back too? (that thought breaks my very heart)
When the 6 yr old boy left 4 months ago, he asked about him once or twice and then all was forgotten. But cognitively, he will mature and realize children are coming and going in our home. But he will still be too young to understand the concept of Foster*Care.
I think he is going to miss TheGirl more than the 6 yr old. He's older now & I think he will know she is "gone".
I think this will hurt him when she leaves and I will have no way to explain to him why his "siser" left.
I'm not sure I know how to handle this.
Sunday, August 03, 2008
This Boy fell asleep on my couch.
This Boy peed on my couch. Well, technically his diaper wasn't changed before he fell asleep & it leaked....on my couch. Dang it. Now I need a new couch! And I should probably change diaper brands.
Is it just me or does it hurt your neck just looking at the way The Boy is laying there?